Okay. Let's see if I still got it. I have seen a bunch of movies in the past years that I didn't write too much about, so let's see if I can tackle them in a single post.
Batman versus Superman
Lex luthor sucks. Character motivations make no sense. Movie spends more time setting up sequels than focusing on the plot. Was there a point to ridiculous dream sequences, the random time traveller that served no purpose, or bruce's vision of the reign of superman? Also, Frank Miller's Crazy Steve as the goddamn batman? Seriously? I thought we got over Miller and accepted that the guy is three fries short of a happy meal. But most importantly, didn't it feel like we missed TWO WHOLE MOVIES? We should've had one with superman where he foils lex, thus giving him a reason to hate supes, and one with batman where the joker kills jason todd. You can't just go into the big event movie if there hasn't been a status quo established first. And I immediately ate my words, because I just realised that's EXACTLY what DC has been doing for the past five years.
Can someone tell me what the point of this movie was, besides showing off Jared Leto as the joker, or establishing fat government lady who's name I keep forgetting? Here's an idea. Make a black ops squad out of convicted criminals with special abilities. Get together some of the most dangerous hitmen, gangsters and serial killers, and make them save the world. Aside from that being a dumb idea in universe, whith no proper justification, what exactly are they supposed to save the world from? Alien mayincatec gods and their flying ring of trash? Sure. Why not have spiderman face off against mephisto while you're at it (although considering the reboot going on, it wouldn't surprise me if the next spiderman movie WILL be an adaptation of One More Day). And in the end, what was the point of the bad guys saving the day for once? Neither of the characters have been established in previous movies, so we didn't have much of a chance to get to know them as bad guys, so the point of them becoming good guys didn't feel all that impactful. And there was nothing about the story that couldn't have been resolved by the usual heroes. Also, croc is the comic relief. AGAIN. And he throws a bomb at the baddies. It was a big bomb.
Captain America: civil war
I'm tempted to say the basis for the plot was weak, weaker than the original comic, but then again, the original was a shitty propaganda comic that pretended to be thought provoking but backfired so miserably that the writers had to come up with the bullshit excuse that the side that they went out of their way to paint as irredeemable fascists were supposed to be right all along. Oh yeah, and Tommy Wisseau's The Room was a parody all along. But yeah. The movie. My cousing in law convinced me that age of ultron wasn't important so I went into this without knowing who half these characters are. Granted I've seen iron man 3 and it still took me time to recall who war machine was. The legislation the characters have been fighting over in the comics got tossed aside real quick despite half the movie was setting it up, and replaced by a weak excuse plot. The final twist and the villain's motivation was so dumb I'm surprised it made it through drafting stage, and the final straw that gets cap and tony at each other's throats is even weaker than what caused the eponymous civil war in the first place. I was also not of fan of iron man's new liquid metal suit, or spiderman's new design, or the need to make it sound technological, even though it's just an ordinary bodysuit. Also, Aunt May gets younger with each new soiderman reboot. I'm afraid of what she'll look like if a fourth reboot happens. Especially considering how the writers tend to treat her relationship with Peter. Freud would have a field day with it, that's for sure.
And now for something completely different. Let me get this out of the way first. The people who made this movie did it for one reason: because they can. That is the number one thing everyone needs to keep in mind before looking at it. They could put Gul'dan on the big screen. They could put all the flashy shiny particle effects from the game on the big screen. They could put the dark portal or all the locations from the game on the big screen. And most important of all, that they can turn a guy into a sheep for comedic effect, in a hollywood superproduction. Aside from the weird backgrounds that looked obciously fake most of the time (seriously, couldn't they just build a set?), and how the orc camps looked suspiciously like they were taken from the game (with slightly improved graphics), I don't have too many complaints about it. The orcs looked mostly convincing, but the special effects teem seem to have trouble understanding how bones and teeth break. Dalaran was ridiculously over the top, but then again, it looked just as stupid in the game. Garona was unnecessary and whoever wrote her was under the impression that online mary sue litmus tests are genuine guides for writing characters, and Gul'Dan's inability to do anything without casually sucking someone's life-juice made it hard to take him seriously. Orgrim, Durotan and Medivh obviously carried the whole movie on their backs, and I especially liked the later and his jesus motif, although the possession by Sargeras was just as ridiculous as the other over the top scenes. Also, "green is bad".